Saturday, April 30, 2005

YOU CAN NOW LEAVE COMMENTS!!!

I know you've been waiting.....

A Room Without A View #2

Where Is This Place Exactly?

How come EVERY SINGLE KID IN AMERICA knows that little song "Theres a place in France where the naked ladies dance/Theres a hole in the wall where you can see it all." Me and Angelo were talking about how it's crazy that little kids have their own underground culture.

Movie Review: Hearts of Darkness

This is the documentary of a film maker's apocalypse. Or, more specifically, Franis Ford Coppola's struggle to make the motion picture Apocalypse Now in the late 70s. Originally intended on being shot in Vietnam itself, the was found too dangerous and filming was done in the Phillapines instead. The footage in the documentary is primarily shot by Coppola's wife and often accompanied by her narration of the diary she kept during the 200+ days of shooting. There were many disasters to overcome throughout the adventure of making this movie, including harsh weather, Philapine rebels and Martin Sheen's heart attack. Not to mention the fact that Coppola had to deal with the bitch that is Marlon Brando. Marlon demanded insane amounts of money and didn't even bother to read the book before filming started! I would have sent that fat ass back home and got somebody decent to work with. It's not like he was even that perfect for the role of Kurtz anyways. Nobody reads Conrad's Heart of Darkness and says "if they ever make this into a movie they absolutely must use Marlon Brando as Kurtz!" If I was the film maker, I would have used Oscar the grouch before I chose Brando. It's not that he's a bad actor, it's just that I hate him.
If you like Apocalypse Now, Hearts of Darkness is a must see.

4 stars

Movie Review: Blue Velvet

Blue Velvet is an entertainingly twisted and dark drama, as with all of Lynch's films. It starts off when an average boy in an average town finds a severed ear in a field while walking one afternoon. The story goes on from there and I think that's all I have to say to make you watch this film.

4 stars

Friday, April 29, 2005

Put Your Urine Where Your Mouth Is

On the internet, people use short little phrases like "brb" (be right back) or make little faces with different keys to show an emotion such as a smile :-) . There is even one for "put your money where your mouth is" that looks like this: :-$ . But here is my confusion, there is also a common "smiley" used that looks like this: :-P . Now, using what we have learned from our "put your $ where your mouth is" smiley face, I can only assume that the smiley, :-P , means "put your Pee where your mouth is." I don't know why people say this to me online. Not only is it rude, but it doesn't make that much sense.

Movie Review: Assassination of Richard Nixon

The Assassination of Richard Nixon is a extremely powerful film. This great film documents more than the life and death of a perticular assassin; it brilliantly illustrates the death of the American Dream. Indeed, this is the central theme of the movie and what ties it all together.
The Assassination brings us into the life of Samuel Bicke, a recently divorced disgrunteled salesman who is mad as hell and isn't going to take it anymore. It is the mad story of a true man who feels that nobody can do anything to stop the corruption and greed of the country. A single grain of sand usually can't make any difference, but Bicke is out to prove that if you believe in yourself and see yourself as you want, you can become that person and get what you want done. This movie really gets into the heart of Bicke, who defines the word "disgruntled."
Parts of the film might remind you of a depressing verison of Office Space, as Bicke is a usually meek worker with a uncaring boss. It also might remind you of Taxi Driver, as in Taxi Driver there is a main character who fits the same role as the disgruntled, obsessive employee about to snap. Plus it helps that DeNiro's character is named "Travis Bickle", which isn't that far from the name "Samuel Bicke." Not to mention, Travis Bickle attempts to assassinate the President as well.
The Assassination is a very moody and emotional film. I actually felt a bit depressed while watching it. Sean Penn plays an amazing role as Bicke, a performance so believeable and so utterly realistic that we can't help but feel many of the same emotions Bicke goes through. The supporting cast include Naomi Watts and Don Cheadle.
It's unfortunate that this film went almost completely under the radar in it's release. It is out on dvd now, so I suggest you rent it.

4 stars

Wednesday, April 27, 2005

Tuesday, April 26, 2005

Movie Review: Audition

Audition is a Japanese film that starts of as a normal movie, but as it progresses things get stranger and stranger. A man is told by his son that he is old and should find a new wife (his last wife died). So he meets up with his friend in the film industry and they set up an "audition" for the movie, which the man uses to find a good candidate for his new wife. He instantly falls for a certain shy girl at first glance. Soon they are dating and things go smoothely... until he begins to look into her dubious past. Everything goes down from there. Nothing is what it seems. The surreal nightmare begins.
If you like thriller/horror movies with graphic violence that almost makes you want to look away, then you'd like this film.
Also, if you like the fact that the word "deeper" in Japanese sounds like "kitty", you might enjoy the scene in which a man is punctured by needles while the girl says in a high pitch friendly voice "deeper, deeper, deeper." Of course, to us it sounds like "kitty, kitty, kitty." That was probably my favorite scene.

3 3/4 stars

Movie Review: Cry Baby

Imagine if the Footloose was a good movie, that's Cry Baby. When you watch this great film/musical you can tell right away it's the work of John Waters. Actually, you'd probably be able to guess that just by the pressense of a character named "Hatchet Face." Or the scene with Iggy Pop bathing himself in a bucket at a redneck style shack.
The story takes place in 1950s Maryland. "Cry Baby" Walker and his group of juvenile delinquents, or "drapes", meet a square girl named Alison. Cry Baby falls in love right away and the feeling is mutual. Alison has a square boyfriend and square parents who hate Cry Baby and his gang. And in turn, the drapes hate the squares. It's the Romeo and Juliet theme we find so common in movies that we hardly notice it anymore. But, that doesn't make it a bad movie.
Cry Baby has an all-star line up starting with Johnny Depp as the main character. Also in it is Traci Lords, whom you might remember from such classics as Sweedish Erotica 57 and Hot Cum Orgy. But Let's not forget Ricki Lake who wonderfully played the fat pregnant gang member, and of course Iggy Pop as the grandfather of Depp's character.
All in all, its a good movie you should see.

4 stars

Sunday, April 24, 2005

Omitted Information: The Starbucks Logo Is A Woman Spreading Her Legs

It is an image many of us see every day and is extremely recognizable to the American public, but what is the Starbucks logo depicting anyways? First of all, I should mention the significance of the brand name. "Starbuck" was actually a character in the novel Moby Dick. This leads us closer to the formation of the logo itself. If have already figured out on your own that the Starbucks logo is a mermaid; you are half-right. The logo is specifically of a siren; a Greek mythological creature defined as "one of a group of sea nymphs who by their sweet singing lured mariners to destruction on the rocks surrounding their island." The "sea nymph" is typically depicted as a beautiful woman mermaid with two tails. Of course, two tails is a bit more seductive to the male sailer than a single tailed creature with ambiguous reproductive organs. The original logo was plain to see, but today it is almost impossible to decipher without first viewing the logo's history.

A former Starbucks employee wrote of the change in design: The Starbucks logo shown in the parody is similar to one of the official logos the company used before it "cleaned up" the siren. The evolution of the siren in the logo has gone from a really seductive and wild-looking thing with exposed breasts and a navel, holding each end of a split tail around her ears (making one think that if she had naughty bits, you would certainly be seeing them); to a rather more comely version, still with breasts and the edges of the tail around the sides of her head; to one without visible nipples but still a navel and tail; to the Disney-esque thing seen today. As the company grew, they seemed to be cleaning her up for the lowest common denominator.(1)

It wasn't too far from the truth when cartoonist Kieron Dwyer made his infamous "Corporate Whore" logo-parody of the coffee giant.


The Original Starbucks Logo: Clearly depicting a female with her legs spread.


The Updated Logo: Stylized version of the original.


Today's Logo: A second version of the stylized logo with "explicit" content cropped out.

notes: 1. Salon.com, Hot water: Starbucks sues a citizen, 06/01/00, Letters To The Editor, Leslie Strom, 06/02/00

Shy Kids

Have you ever wanted a creepy little child standing in the corner of your room to freak you out everytime you go in there? Well here is what you've been waiting for. It's Shy Kids! They are like life-size dolls that you stand up in the corner of your room facing the wall and it looks like a small child that is too shy to come out. I don't know why, but this is probably the creepiest product I've ever heard of. They go for about $50 and upwards, but I'm sure they are worth every penny! Visit the website (www.shykids.co.uk) to see different models or purchase your very own Shy Kid. Why has nobody thought of such a marvelous idea before?

Thursday, April 21, 2005

A Room Without A View #1

First comic of my new series (that in all likely hood I will forget about after maybe the second strip)

Well here it is. I think I'm gonna call it "Black Pope." Once you read it, you'll probably think it's a good title.

Monday, April 18, 2005

Emo Band Name

Too bad I hate emo music, cos I just thought of the best emo band name! It would be called "The 'Lesser Than' Trio" and here is the best part.... check out the symbol/logo: <3

Sunday, April 10, 2005

Movie Review: Sin City

So apparently this movie, Sin City, is based on three graphic novels (aka COMIC books). I've never heard of the comics before, and I'm not going to pretend like I have. It's a dark and violent film taking place in "Basin City", a fictional city, yet just as corrupt as our real ones. Such a stylistic attempt at portraying graphically excessive violence was the perfect job for director Robert Rodriguez. Afterall, he just finished the Spy Kids trilogy and has had lots of practice with this type of genre.... only kidding, Spy Kids is in fact a children's trilogy, but it's nice to see Rodriguez is getting back to his roots.
This is probably the first movie I've ever seen that had a "Special Guest Director." It was Quentin Tarentino of course, who Rodriguez has worked with before on various other projects. It's almost Tarintino's cameo in Desperado..... except in Sin City you have no idea which parts Tarentino was involved in... and for all we know he had nothing to do with the fillm.... but he probably did... but then again... theres no way of telling... I guess we will have to take the introductorary credits for their word.
The film is shot in black and white, with color accents only on certain things such as blood, cars, eyes and occasionally even some skin. Imagine a movie shot in "Gatorade Vision."


Micheal Jordan IN Sin City

Most things baring the color red are not in black and white, nevertheless, the first blood seen in the movie is actually white. I liked Luis' statement after a character gets shot: "all that and then birds crapped on him too??" Another good observation by Luis was that a certain villan looked remarkably like Charlie Brown. This perticular bad guy was strong yet swift, and it seemed that he could not be defeated. While we were at the edge of our seats, I consoled Luis that the good guys would eventually find a football to set up for the villan to kick and sucessfully use his one weakness against him.

Right now I would like to pay homage to the Pope and his wonderfull legacy. It was only a few days ago that he left us and made the world a---- I mean--- went on to a better place. Rodriguez was very thoughtful in dedicating his movie to the man. Well, he hasn't actually came out and said it's a tribute to the Pope, but you can pretty much tell.



Speaking of tributes.... why was David Lynch not credited in this movie? There should have been some sort of credit like "some aspects of the film stolen from..." which Lynch would get credit for. Take Lynch's Lost Highway for example. When I was watching Sin City there came a scene where a character was driving a car and the shot and angle looked exactly like the shot used in Lynch's film. Also, the "yellow bastard" in the film looked very, very similar to the goblin type guy also in Lost Highway.

Hey, speaking of that yellow guy that looked like he was made out of mustard, why was Bran of CKY not credited for inspiration for the mustard man song? ... Actually, I think I'm starting to get a little crazy with these "would be" credits now.

It is also worthy to note that the film hints at Bruce Willis getting with a young girl.... reminescent of the rumors of him and Lindsay Lohan.

Another interesting tidbit is that all these people were originally intended to be in the film: Christopher Walken, Willem Dafoe, Steve Buschem, Leonardo DiCaprio and Michael Douglas!! Oh yeah, and even Johnny Depp! Talk about a all-star line up (plus DiCaprio). Rodriguez intends on filming all of the "Sin City" comics and there are rumors that his friend Depp (who couldn't play a role in the movie due to previous commitments) might play a lead role in a sequel... we have that to look forward to.

In short, this was a great movie. The plot was a little thin at times and none of the stories really "came together", but then again, it is based on three different comic books and I think the film did an amazing job at that. It is very entertaining and highly enjoyable. My only lament is that there was no milk man. It just seemed like the type of movie that could have used a milk man. I mean, he wouldn't need a big role or even any lines. Just some milk being delivered in the background at some point would have been pretty cool. But then again, they might have been saving that for the sequel...

4 1/2 stars

Wednesday, April 06, 2005

Rank Bobberies

I highly encourage any form of bank robbery as long as nobody gets hurt. I developed a good method based on reverse psychology....

Robber: Alright, Please, Don't Give me your money. All of it. Don't give it to me.
Teller: Wise guy huh? How do you like THIS then! (throws a bunch of money at you).

I think my plan is airtight.

Movie Review: Happiness of The Katakuris

The Japanese dark comedy, Happiness of The Katakuris, is the tale of a family who builds a guest house in hopes of running a sucessful family business. A new road is supposed to be paved and bring many travelers near the area so the father figure fixes up an old house until it is ready for guests. The road isn't finished yet, but some travelers start coming.... The problem is that they keep dying on their first nights stay in the home.
Katakuris opens with a scene in which a woman is eating soup. Upon probing the soup with her fork she notices a bug-eyed angel inside of it which pops out of the soup and flys away. The movie has amazing claymation in it and is worth watching for that aspect alone.
I know what you are thinking "That's pretty funny, a clay angel popping out of the soup!", but I'd have to disagree. I think that the whole "angel-in-the-soup" gag is way over used. It's like I can't go to a movie nowadays without seeing an angel pop out of somebodies soup and scare the person! Of course the audience laughs everytime, but I'm like "that was so predictable! didn't you see that coming??" I mean, don't get me wrong its funny when it happens in real life, but when it's in a movie and is all scripted like that it is just plain cliche and boring. Hollywood, can't you think of anything new for a change?
Anywho, more about the film. It is part musical, so be warned. Randomly characters will break out into song and dance in different scenes. There is even one scene in which the dead start dancing as well, which is probably as close as we will ever get to a Japanese version of Michael Jackson's Thriller music video. In one particularly long and boring love duet, the lyrics to the song are shown on the screen in a "bouncing ball" style urging the viewer to sing along. I would have, but I don't know Japanese all that well. I mean, at all. Plus, that song sucked.

3 1/2 stars

Friday, April 01, 2005

Comments Don't Work? That's Crazy

Yeah, the comments don't work. It's crazy.

Cats Having Their Own Country? That's Crazy

(11:31) Papupe1: dont laugh but i have to put the cats to bed now
gotta go

(11:32) Grayson: are you going to tuck them in

(11:32) Papupe1: yeah...

(11:32) Grayson: tell them about the 3 blind mice
they would like that

(11:32) Papupe1: they have their own rome

(11:32) Grayson: holyshit

(11:32) Papupe1: room

(11:32) Grayson: thats a big country
oh ok

(11:32) Papupe1: that would be cool!

(11:32) Grayson: wait, rome is in italy
oh well

(11:32) Papupe1: ya its a city

(11:33) Grayson: it woud be cool if they had their own country though

(11:33) Papupe1: true that

(11:33) Grayson: kind of desolate... but cool neverthe less
i'd go
check things out

(11:33) Papupe1: yeah...

(11:33) Grayson: hook the brothers up with some milk

(11:33) Papupe1: declare meaningless war

(11:33) Grayson: ?
no way would i make war on them

(11:34) Papupe1: knock down the kitty condos

(11:34) Grayson: theyd totally outclaw all my ground troops
no way

(11:34) Papupe1: burn the drug crops

(11:34) Grayson: i wouldn't mess with them
the vast cat nip fields

(11:35) Papupe1: do your ground troops consist of like 5 guys?
i could take on a cat

(11:35) Grayson: no. like 8 thousand

(11:35) Papupe1: maybe even 3 cats
oh

(11:35) Grayson: but once they enter that country, the UN says you can only battle by use of clawing
and my troops haven't had that kind of training yet

(11:35) Papupe1: that would be a downfal

(11:35) Grayson: i know

(11:35) Papupe1: fall

(11:36) Grayson: i try to stay on their good side
thats why i bring the milk when i go there

(11:36) Papupe1: and bannana bread cats like bannana bread

(11:36) Grayson: and ice cream cats like ice cream

(11:37) Papupe1: yeah i gotta go

(11:37) Grayson: alright

(11:37) Papupe1: i like talking to you

(11:37) Grayson: tell them i hope they have a good night

(11:37) Papupe1: bout nothing
ok i will

(11:37) Grayson: in cat terms of course

(11:37) Papupe1: yeah
bye

(11:37) Grayson: cya