Thursday, September 23, 2004

The Many Hats of Revolutionaries

The Many Hats of Revolutionaries or: Hats off to the Revolution

To be a successful revolutionary, it is essential to constantly wear a cool hat. Sure, you'll need intellect, courage, a large following and all that stuff, but first off, you'll need a hat. Just look throughout history to see what I mean. The infamous Mexican revolutionaries Pancho Villa and Emiliano Zapata totally sported those big sombreros all the time. Many believe their success largely was due to the sombreros themselves.
Another fine example would be Che Guevera. Che's hair was going all over the place during his fight for freedom in Cuba. Luckily, one day he stumbled upon that cool beret with the star on it. From then on he was able to simply tuck some of his hair up into it, thus enabling the revolutionary to see even more clearly in his fight for freedom. Further along the line, revolutionist Fidel Castro won over the masses of a poverty stricken Cuba in a triumph over the tyrannic Batista government. I think we all know that Castro would be nothing without his cool little green hat and cigars. Which brings me back to another point; tobacco.
Tobacco also helps in being a revolutionary. Castro is a good example of this, but so is Subcommandante Marcos, currently the vanguard of the EZLN movement for worker freedom in Chiapas, Mexico. Marcos is rarely seen without a pipe in his mouth. He even has a special hole in his ski-mask to fit the pipe through. Oh yeah, did I mention that he wears a ski-mask? He wears a ski-mask alright. And as if that wasn't enough, he wears a hat on top of it too! That's my kind of revolutionary. Marcos takes the best from all worlds: his own signature ski-mask look, tobacco in a pipe, a Castro style hat and not one, not two, but three stars on his hat, reminiscent of Guevera (times three!). Talk about a man with ideas! He has definately raised the bar for future revolutionaries and future hats. I sure wouldn't want to follow that act.

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