What Every Child Should Do

One thing that everybody should do as a child is burn down a random house (not your own), complete with people inside. Make sure to do it at a young enough age so people will think "oh, he didn't know what he was doing. He's too young!" This way, whenever you do anything bad later on in life, your parents will just say "Hey, at least it's not as bad as that time he burnt down a house." And everything you do will look good in comparison.