March Mayhem Movie Madness!!

Another crazy coincidence: My birthday is coming up on March 6th. On that night my band, Deadmary, is playing at the Rio Rancho Battle of the Bands. The guitarist's girlfriend has her birthday on that same night as well and the other guitarist's birthday is the day after that day. Also, my mom's birthday is the day before, but she isn't in my band.

PS: the word "Movie" in the title of this post just seemed like it fat... I mean, fitted, it seemed like it fitted.

Monster of Belleville

Damn! I just noticed yesterday in some paper that Triplets of Belleville was playing in the theaters, so today me and luis went to see it and what do you know, it closed yesterday! Shit, did it play for like a week? That was wac. What was even more wac is that Luis said that we didn't have to pay parking cos it was the weekend, but it WASN'T the weekend, but we didn't realize this! Doh! The movie wasn't playing and we had to just go pack to the lot and pay some parking ticket action. CRAP! The story has a good ending though, because tonight I saw 'Monster' staring Christina Ricci and Charlize Theron. Theron is up for best actress, and could easily get it, as her acting in that movie was so freakin good, it was to the limit. Also, she looked so freakin different! Holly shit, you could no way recognize her.

Charlize Theron	Charlize Theron in "MONSTER"

'Monster' is a really good movie. It's about a ghost and Christina Ricci getting a new house... wait, no. It's about a prostitute and Christina Ricci being a lesbian who is ambigiously one of the ages of 15 or 21. It was probably the most intense movie I've seen since 'Requiem For a Dream', or possibly even 'Casper'.

PS: This is prolly one of my favorite websites devoted to people in white and green striped shirts.

Current Music: Gary Pine and Dollarman - Time (Pink Floyd)
My Rating: 4

South Park Coincidence

A coincidence would be: today I was making this game where you throw snowballs, and Luis said I should make the main character a South Park character, since it's snowy. I asked him if he said that because the font I was using was from South Park (although the font wasn't called that), and he said he didn't even know the font was from South Park. In less than a minute, a South Park song by Rancid played on my mp3 player.

2 Deadmary Songs

I just found out that at the warped tour's battle of the bands website, you can play two pretty good quality songs by my band Deadmary. It's not for shizzle if we are going to play at the warped tour 04' (as only 4 bands can be accepted, but we have entered and we will know in may).
PS: The two songs at the ernie ball website are better quality than that of the 'crappy demo' that we have been selling for $2. We are in the process of replacing all the songs of the 'crappy demo' with the better quality ones and selling what is known on the street as a 'quality demo'. People who bought the other demo will get $2 off of the earlier demo, or something... it's not figured out yet.
Listen To The Songs Online (unfortunately I don't think you can download them to your hard drive)
Visit Our Official Website

Nightmare Before Coincidence

You know that feeling you get when you have a dream about being in a giant lego store and seeing invididual lego characters from 'the Nightmare Before Christmas' being sold, then a month or two later you are searching Google with an image search for "kubrick" only to find that there is a brand called "kubrick" that actually SELLS individual lego characters from 'the Nightmare Before Christmas'? Well, I do.
PS: Click on the picture to see the packaging

The Answer Is...

Yesterday's question was "Which famous director looks remarkably like Mr. Bean?". Well, the answer is, Stanley Kubrick!

Current Music: Satan's Pilgrims-Creature Feature
My Rating: 3

Semi-Annual Pop Quiz #2

Which famous director looks remarkably like Mr. Bean?
Hint: I watched a documentary on him today.

The Bad Brains Are A Good Band

I saw a band the other night called "New Mexico Disaster Squad", and yes, they ARE from Florida. In case you were wondering. Any band that names themselves after a random state that they've never been to is bound to pick a GOOD band to cover. They played a Bad Brains cover. Oh, also, Sheppard Fairey, the OBEY man, understands the wonder that is Bad Brains. (see posters above)

Man and Woman

Sometimes I can't even believe our society. Humans are supposed to be so advanced, but our society is so fucking stupid. Bush is proposing a constitutional amendment that restricts same sex marriages. Now we ALL know our president is a fucking idiot son of an asshole, but it's worse than that. Our local news station said "and how do New Mexicans feel?" and they showed that in their poll, "65% support the ban on gay-marriages". They interviewed different locals, and one said "for years marriage has been between a man and a woman and I don't think that should change". What a fucking great reason to be in support of something, because "it's been that way for years". I wanna slap that guy in the face every week for the next dozen years and he'll HAVE to be ok with it by that time, because after all "it's been that way for years, and I don't think it should change"... or what would be even better is if his daughter came out of the closet and all of a sudden he realized that it's not cool to be against gays (a certain Dick Cheny comes to mind). What is almost as amazing as the fact that many people somehow feel it is their duty to stop gays from marrying, is the fact that it is 'controversial' in the first place! I can hardly understand how this is even considered a major 'issue'. I won't be surprised next week when I see the commercial for our news, "should blacks be able to marry? your votes at 10:00".

Natural Sound Incident

You know when you hear a song on your headphones and the recording is so good that you can swear that somebody is really playing the guitar in one corner of the room (or a helicopter is actually flying by, which has happened to me while listening to 'Rancid-Black Hawk Down'... or you are walking down the street listening to 'Dead Kennedys-Jockorama' and the song has a car crash in it so you think a REAL car crash happened and run down to the end of the block to see it, only then realizing that it was a part of the music... which I'd be lying if I said has not happened to me..). So I was at the listening station at Natural Sound listening to a cd. There was a Igor type character talking in the song and the quality of the song's panning made it sound JUST like it was coming from right in front of me. Well, I wanted to listen to it even better so I turned it up some more... I then realized that everybody was looking at me and that I had taken the set of headphones from the station NEXT to mine, the headphones I was supposed to have on WERE right in front of me (really loud too!). I was listening to the song via headphones that werent even on while the real headphones were sitting in front of me playing really loud. Oh boy, I looked quite the fool, an April's fool as it were.

'Merican... Good?

As you all surely know, one of the greatest bands of all hella tyte rockin' roll history was the DECENDANTS. Now, you all surely know as well that the DECENDANTS broke up because Milo (singer) went off to college. The remaining members then formed a band that lacked ALL of the original DECENDANTS members, they named this band 'ALL'. ALL had a different singer than Milo, and well, sucked. Now, a 5 song cd has been put out on the market by the newly reformed DECENDANTS (all original members). The 5 songer is called " 'Merican"... This leads me to the question, "Will this music end up being bad just as most bands sound 20 years after their last good album?". I guess the world will never know... unless they buy that new cd... which they might. Personally, what I will do is wait until they come out with a full-length cd (which will have all but 2 of the songs of the 'Merican cd), listen to it, and if it's good, purchase it.

Snowman Slapping Action

Check out the greatest game in the world!

White Bad Brains

A certain friend of mine (I won't say who, saving them the extreme embarassment) was recently telling me about how they didn't really like how the Bad Brains were rastifarian style. I then said, "well, they're like Jamican or something". The friend then said surprised "they are?! I always thought they were just a bunch of white guys who sung about being rastifarian for some reason!". Oh boy, that was silly. That's right kids, don't be confused, the members of Bad Brains are black. I know the dark skin and dreadlocks might throw you off at first, but they are actually black.

Babes For Bush

I heard Bush spellchecked it himself. ('calender')

Yes, there really is a girly calendar called "Babes For Bush". All proceeds go to the Bush/Cheney propaganda machine. Here is a nice excerpt from the site, oh and once again, I will post my comments in the parenthesis...

"Weapon of Mass Destruction
By Patti Dahlstrom
For 50 years the world said we would never let another Holocaust happen. There would never be another Germany of World War II. And yet for twelve years a madman was slaughtering, torturing, and imprisoning over a million of his own innocent people, and no one lifted a finger. (Here I am not quite sure if they are referring to Saddam or Bush W, both of which were put in power by the U.S. government dispite the majority opinion of it's people)
The U.N. was impotent in following through on their demands (the same U.N. that is controlled by the U.S. government?). Along with France, Germany, Russia and China they were making too much money on the food, oil, and weapons contracts to worry about it (This is for real, this is actually posted on the site, it's not some sarcastic comment of mine!). They turned their backs and made hypocritical threats, all in the name of the almighty dollar. (China is well known for making money on food contracts all in the name of the AMERICAN DOLLAR)
Hussein himself was the weapon of mass destruction, just as Hitler and Stalin were before him (I'm reminded of the old saying "U.S. supplied weapons don't kill people, people kill people"). He funded terrorism in his own country and in ours (he funded terrorism in OUR country? oh, you must be thinking of... oh, wait, no, you're just lying for the sake of your argument). He was the holocaust.
Finally America, Britain, Australia, and a few other countries had the balls to stop it. Yes, hundreds of our boys and girls died doing what their soul (aka the government) called (aka swindled) them to do, fight for freedom (aka corporate/economic interests). No one mentions the tens of thousands of lives that have been spared for their sacrifice (they're too caught up in asking "what tens of thousands of lives?"). No one mentions that the holocaust was stopped (I'm confused, is he talking about Saddam, terrorism, or the ACTUAL holocaust? Stop labeling everything 'the holocaust'!). No one mentions that they kept the world's word and cleared its conscience (what exactly is the 'world's word'?).
But they did it. They stopped it. God bless them." (What exactly did "they" stop? The holocaust? They sure didn't stop fucking terrorism, so what the hell did they stop?)

Current Music: Dickies - I'm Ok, You're Ok
My Rating: 3

Semi-Annual Pop Quiz #1

What movie uses both the terms 'cock-gobblers' and 'ass-clown'? First one to get it right wins. Enter your guess via the comments. No purchase neccesary.

Current Music: Wipers - Return of the Rat
My Rating: 4
Comments: I often listen to the Wipers right after pooping.

Metal Slug

I've had numerous emails sent to me asking again and again: "Dear El Grayso, how can I metal slug it up?". Well kids, you can metal slug it up right here.

Current Music: Radiohead - Talkshow Host

Devil's Entertainment

Today I stumbled upon the following blog. It had a post on it about how pornography was ruining the world and a bunch of conservative christian rhetoric. A few people posted comments on it, but me, I posted the motha of all comments on that bia-otch. You should definitely read it.
CLICK HERE TO VIEW POST/COMMENTS

Plan 9

Today in one of my classes, we watched like 10 minutes of Plan 9 From Outer Space. It's the worst movie ever made. Yeah right. I hate how everybody says that it's the worst movie ever. Yeah, sure, there are some minor glitches in the movie like when people accidently knock over tombstone sets and such, but imagine it more like watching a play. You don't say "this is the worst play ever made!" when your daughter knocks over a cardboard turkey in the thanksgivings day pageant, so why is Plan 9 the worst? Besides, you can easily think of much worse movies than it. Apparently nobody has seen a certain movie called Seabiscuit--Well, I haven't seen it either, but it's called Seabiscuit. What a blatant disregard for making a decent movie title. I'm sure if the inventors of the word sea, and the word biscuit knew what hiddious things would be done with their creations, they would have thought twice about making those two words. Also, now get this, my sources (the movie poster) tell me that the movie doesn't even have anything to do with the sea, or biscuits! Apparently, it's actually about Toby Mcguire riding a horse. Given all this information, I think we can all come to the proper agreement that this is a bad movie that nobody should see. Yet nobody acclaims Seabiscuit as "the worst movie ever made!", but they do to poor Plan 9. The "worst movie ever made!" generalization is an utter lie. It doesn't take more than a few episodes of Mystery Science Theater to see that there are much worse movies out there than Plan 9. Hey, even if Plan 9 was the worst movie out there in terms of acting and sets, it would still be a good movie. Nobody takes into account that it was low-budget. For some reason people seem to think "Hey, wait a second, they are using hubcaps for UFOs! I could be a much better director than this Ed Wood fellow. I would simply use million dollar UFO sets and computer graphics instead of hubcaps. Damn, that Ed Wood is stupid, my idea is way better". Well, despite popular belief, "million dollar UFO sets and computer graphics" can cost up to millions of dollars. The next thing you know people will being saying "Raging Bull was the worst movie ever made! Just look at it, it's black and white.... BLACK AND WHITE for gods sake! You won't see this kind of nonsense in the award winning Seabiscuit!". Let's look at another movie, Independence Day. Aliens come to earth from another planet looking to destroy/take it over. And to think, the preview made it look like a cliche plot. Looks like somebody deserves an award for originality. No, not you Ed Wood, we were talking about Will Smith. Despite the fact that Plan 9 was one of the most original plots I've ever seen in a movie (especially an alien movie), it is still regarded as terrible. I know what your thinking "Your stupid, dont u realze that its just anther 1 of those movie where aliens come 2 earth an ttry to take it ovar?". Well, all you folks that say that should be rounded up and shot, for you didn't understand the plot of the movie at all. Fuck off and go watch Seabiscuit.

Angel of Death = Barbie

"Auschwitz, the meaning of pain/ The why that I want you to die/ Slow death, immense decay/ Showers that cleanse you of your life/ Forced in/ Like cattle/ You run/ Stripped of/ Your life's worth/ Human mice, for the Angel of Death/ Four hundred thousand more to die/ Angel of Death/ Monarch to the kingdom of the dead/ Sadistic, surgeon of demise/ Sadist of the noblest blood/ Destroying, without mercy/ To benefit the Aryan race/ Surgery, with no anesthesia/ Fell the knife pierce you intensely/ Inferior, no use to mankind/ Strapped down screaming out to die/ Pumped with fluid, inside your brain/ Pressure in your skull begins pushing through your eyes/ Burning flesh, drips away/ Test of heat burns your skin, your mind starts to boil/ Frigid cold, cracks your limbs/ How long can you last/ In this frozen water burial?/ Sewn together, joining heads/ Just a matter of time/ 'Til you rip yourselves apart/ Millions laid out in their/ Crowded tombs/ Sickening ways to achieve/ The holocaust/ Seas of blood, bury life/ Smell your death as it burns/ Deep inside of you/ Abacinate, eyes that bleed/ Praying for the end of/ Your wide awake nightmare/ Wings of pain, reach out for you/ His face of death staring down,/ Your blood running cold/ Injecting cells, dying eyes/ Feeding on the screams of/ The mutants he's creating/ Pathetic harmless victims/ Left to die/ Rancid Angel of Death/ Flying free"

I've had the most intense craving for Slayer's music lately. Especially "Angel of Death". In the beginning of that song the vocalist screams so high pitched it sounds like a guitar at first, I don't think I have to tell you that it rules. My favorite song by them is "Mandatory Suicide", which seems like it's about the Vietnam war. Many people don't realize that many Slayer's lyrics are based off of social problems and things that really happen, such as Mandatory Suicide (about war) and Angel of Death (about the holocaust). The "Angel of Death" that is mentioned, in my opinion, is the infamous Klause Barbie. For those of you who don't know, Barbie is the nazi among nazis, aka "the butcher of Lyon". I'm assuming the song is about him because in the song it says "infamous butcher", and the rest of the song is obviously about the holocaust. Barbie, who got his "butcher of lyon" moniker by murdering thousands of Jews in Lyon, France, was later found guilty of being a war criminal. Of course, the CIA saw this and escorted him from France and gave him protection. In return he would help fight communism in Germany (because Communism is bad). But, I'm sure you've already read about all that in your standard issued history textbooks at school.

Current Music: Slayer - Angel Of Death
My Rating: 5

New Coincidences

Where to start, where to start...
1. Well yesterday at lunch somebody came to our group and said that line from the half-assed movie "Half-Baked" : "fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, you're cool, i'm out". The discussion then went to me taking on three people trying to explain to them that Half-Baked really isn't a good movie if you watch it while sober... or while having decent movie standards. Then in my next class, a bunch of random people were talking and somebody said that same line and they were all trying to remember what it was from. It was kinda weird cos it was the same quote that was said less than an hour ago, but said by a completely different group of random people that I don't even know.
2. Yesterday in class I was writing the outline for a short story that I won't get into right now, but the main part had these kids driving and they got caught by the cops for having weed. Then in the next period, two kids that I know were talking about how the night before they were in their car and they got caught by the cops for having weed.
3. This might be hard to believe, but it seriously happened: Saturday, the day before Super Bowl Sunday, I went to the bookstore with Monet and bought the comedy book Mike Nelson's Mind Over Matters. On saturday, before I bought it, I read one excerpt from it. I will enlighten you with some of this excerpt. Mike was talking about VH1 behind the music type shows and how they sound like this:
{Narrator: Janet Jackson may have been down, but she was not out. In the spring of that year, she showed up at the Siqo foundation for abdominal strength research awards dinnder wearing only one strategically placed cottom ball. Journalist: That was just an amazing moment. That was Janet just saying, "here i am. I'm coming out. I'm wearing a cotton ball and I just don't care who knows it." After all she'd been through, with her record label releasing her album a week late, this was her moment to come back and just say, "Hey, I'm here, and I'm wearing a cotton ball." Henry Rollins: The cotton ball thing-that was genius. I mean if I could caputre that kind of ragged energy in my poems, then I don't know what.}
Once again, the next day would be Super Bowl Sunday, yep, the same super bowl sunday which Janet Jackson showed her boob. The book was written in 2002 and I read that excerpt the day before the super bowl incident. I think it's safe to say that the world revovles around me.

Current Music: Slayer - Mandatory Suicide
My Rating: 5

My Shows

Here are some upcoming shows my band/s are playing in (note: anybody reading this is obligated to go)

February 28, Sat
Deadmary and Youth In Asia (former Stereotypes)
@ the Attic
$5

March 6, Sat
Deadmary
@ the Attic
$ cheap

March 23, Tues
Deadmary
@ the Attic
$ cheap

Triplets of Belleville

Triplets of Belleville looks like the most intense movie ever. I went to see 21 grams last night, which was pretty good, but when we saw the Triplets of Belleville trailer... man. Apparently it came out in october of last year, but I never heard about it. My guess is that they are going to start playing it again, otherwise having it in the previews would make no sense at all. Damn, I gotsta see that movie.

Current Music: Triplets of Belleville theme song (in my head)

MST3K Reviews

I have taken upon the liberty of rating many of the MST3K episodes that I have seen, here are the reviews:

412 Attack of the the Eye Creatures: Yes, there is a typo where there are two 'the's in the actual movie title screen. A highly original (yeah right) 50s movie about aliens coming from outer space. I have yet to finish this one, so I won't rate it yet.

518 Atomic Brain: Early scifi movie that isn't really about any 'atomic brain' but about an old woman who wants to transplant her brain into a younger womans body. 4 stars.

813 Jack Frost: A ridiculous russian movie. It's worth watching just for how ridiculous it is. Some of the jokes are pretty good too, I'd give it 3 1/2 stars.

816 Prince of Space: BNW Japenese scifi film dealing with the prince of space and the evil ruler of "Crank Whore" (Krangor). 50% japenese jokes mixed with 50% miscellanious halarity make it worth 4 1/2 stars.

818 Devil Doll: An english bnw movie about an evil ventriloquist and his dummy. Worth watching just for the movie and the ridiculously random skits of the robots. 3 1/2 stars.

819 Invasion of the Neptune Men: Yet another bnw Japenese movie. Again, get ready for some japenese ridiculing action! It's a lot like Prince of Space mixed with super-man, but not quite as good. 4 stars.

822 Overdrawn at the Memory Bank: Completely ridiculous, drawn out 1984 movie about a man working as a "doppler". I actually didn't finish it cos it was so ridiculous, so I can't say how many stars it gets fairly.

902 Phantom Planet: A great bnw sci-fi movie about a spaceman who travels to another planet to be shrunken down to the scale of the alien inhabitants. One of my favorites. 5 stars.

912 Screaming Skull: My favorite episode. Black and White horror movie about a couple, a skull and a derranged groundskeeper. 5 stars.

913 Delta Knights: This is a fantasy, color film about knights... delta knights to be exact. It's kind of like a modern bad movie about knightdom. Also, there is a guy who looks and sounds just like "Paul" from Spin City. Look for him. I never finished all of this one, so I can't rate it.

1002 Girl in Gold Boots: Color 60s film about drug dealers and go-go girls. It's a pretty swingin movie complete with amazing dance moves. 4 stars.

1006 Boggy Creek 2: A pseudo-horror movie (color) about a a group of students trying to track down bigfoot (pretty much). They also come across the most rednecked man you'll ever see. 4 stars.

1007 Track of the Moon Beast: Color horror movie about a man who ends up with an asteroid in his head. Obviously, he turns into a monster when this happens. 4 stars.

1009 Hamlet: Black and White, German version of the classic "Hamlet". I watched about 10 minutes of this terrible movie before I almost threw up. Maybe I'll finish it someday and rate it.

1011 Horrors of Spider Island: One of my top 3 favorite episodes. BNW horror movie about a group of models and a man who's plane crashes on an island... full of giant spiders! The ditzy blonde jokes are a plenty. 5 stars.

1012 Squirm: Verrry southern horror movie (color) about worms... yes, worms. And a retarded guy... yes, a retarded guy. 3/12 stars.

636

636 different viewers have been to my blog as of this date. Reloads aren't counted. Some of the things people have looked up on google to find my blog are as follows:
1. kottonmouth kings band members tattoos
2. kottonmouth kings pics
3. kottonmouth kings lyrics
4. legal drugs ciggarettes
5. wesley willis gravestone
6. ciggarettes vs. marijuana
7. "start a video rental store"
8. windsheild death

It pays to have bad spelling! I also pride myself in being the headquarters of kottonmouth kings information. Oh, and you don't know how good it feels waking up in the morning thinking to myself about how I am the foremost guru on starting a video rental store.

Current Music: Stitches - I Can't Do Anything
My Rating: 3

Crimson Ghost

Some people think that the Misfits invented the Crimson Ghost. Some people know the Crimson Ghost was from something else originally, but don't know what from. Some people know where it's from. I, myself, have managed to work my way to the third one. For starters, let's clear this up: the Misfits don't make up anything! They base their lyrics (and band title) off of various obscure movies (not that that's a bad thing). Anyways, the Crimson Ghost was originally from a 12 episode long tv show in 1946 (if I can remember right). CG was, obviously, the antagonist of the show. His one goal: acquiring pieces of atomic weaponry to take over the world. So now you know.

Current Music: Richard Hell & The Voidoids - Love Comes In Spurts
My Rating: 3

New Coincidence

Warning: Reading this entry requires reading the last two entries first.
Exactly when I finished posting my last Blog about Luis, he calls! He needs a phone number and reminds me to watch a certain blank mystery tape that he had given me earlier in the day and not told me what was on it. So I pop in the tape and it's a teen tv show and one of the characters is wearing a shirt that I own! I've never seen anybody else with that shirt before either, I got it on the internet. As if that wasn't enough, guess what it was in? Yep, that's right. Degrassi Junior High, which I just posted a link to less than an hour ago before the post about Luis.

Current Music: Flipper - Way Of The World

Battle of the Blogs

At the upcoming presidential election, vote for me and my blog and not Luis. There are many reasons my Blog is superior to Luis', but one example would be how my template is not off the wall crazy-go-nuts. Another example is that Luis will post a picture of a girl at a ska concert and say that he was at that concert too, when he was really sitting at home being unproductive (he would have gotten away with this coax too, if I hadn't stepped in to serve the people). At the same time, I will post a picture of a girl at a ska concert and claim that I was at the concert. The difference is that I actually was at the concert. The girl's name is Brittany. I dunno why they took a picture of her or why they posted it at the Big Spank website given that it was so blurry. Fun Fact: She broke her arm later that night, for real. Now that would have been a worthwhile picture.
PS: For those of you who don't know, the Big Spank is a band that's notorious for their hardcore mosh pits of death and destruction. You know, I would be surprised if she didn't brake her arm. I'm lucky to even be telling this tale.

Current Music: Slayer - Ghosts Of War

This is the most depressing thing I've ever seen. Only go look at the link if you want you're day ruined.

Current Music: Bad Brains - Right Brigade
My Rating: 5

Devil Doll

I just now watched the MST3K episode "Devil Doll" (#817)
PS: No, it isn't the radiskull type of devil doll.
Top 5 things in the movie that happened, made no sense, and were never explained in the slightest bit:
1. Tom Servo turns into a giant talking pastry snack.
2. At one point in the movie there is a sign in the background that says
"welcoming midgets".
3. Pearl and Brain Guy are at a Roman "God Party".
4. Crow and Tom (somehow) acquire heavy british accents and clothes.
5. Tom buys a $3,500 window so he can throw a "killer college party".
... don't even ask, I think Kevin Murphy was high when he wrote this script.

Current Music: Subhumans - Supermarket Forces

[2/5/4-Note from the future: I found out that Tom being a pastry is actually kinda explained because I didn't notice the first time that he asked the devil if his soul could be transported into a toaster strudel. Like I said, "kinda".]

The Truth About Marijuana (aka Blatant Lies)

Man, I've been learning so much non-biased information on marijuana at freevibe.com. I think I'll share the knowledge today with excerpts from the website:

1. Marijuana is not a harmless little plant. Smoking marijuana can lead to some changes in your brain similar to those caused by cocaine, heroin and alcohol (Yes, marijuana leads to temporary changes in your brain similar to drugs. We already know that, that's why it's called a drug). Marijuana contains the same cancer-causing chemicals as the (legal drug) tobacco (although isn't addicting and nobody has died of cancer from it... but still). It can also ruin your future, by getting you kicked out of school (due to anti-marijuana laws, or the plant itself?) or off a sports team (again, due to anti-marijuana laws, or the plant itself?), or get you in trouble with the law (oh, I due to the law). You call that harmless? (You're right, anti-marijuana laws aren't harmless afterall!). And besides, the fact that something is 100 percent natural doesn't mean it's good for you. Heroin is synthesized from a chemical produced by the opium poppy (heroin is synthesized from a chemical produced by... wait, nevermind, herion isn't natural at all). Cocaine is extracted and refined from the coca plant (extracted and refined from...). These are two of the most harmful drugs known today. (I think we should just get it over with and ban plants all together)

2. Marijuana contains the same cancer-causing chemicals as tobacco-including the deadly carcinogen benzopyrene-and at higher concentrations. Smoking four joints a week is equivalent of smoking an entire pack of cigarettes every day (is it really?) which, even in the short term, leads to lung and respiratory problems (I hear you can get lung cancer from the first hit, it's insane). Long-term use increases the chances of tissue damage and lung cancer. Regardless of the content of THC (the intoxicating chemical in marijuana) the amount of tar inhaled by marijuana smokers and the level of carbon monoxide absorbed are three to five times greater than that of tobacco smokers. (ohhhhhh, 3-5 times greater harmful chemicals than cigarettes, so it's really more like: 4 joints a week is equal to about 15 [less than ONE pack of] cigarettes a week in toxicity and not actually "4 joints a week is the equivalent of smoking a pack of cigarettes every day". OK. Let's look at this paragraph and use some basic math here. It says that "Smoking four joints a week is equivalent of smoking an entire pack of cigarettes every day". 20 [cigs per pack] multiplied by 7 [days per week] equals 140. Divide the 140 by 4 [joints a week] and that equals out to be 35 times worse than a cigarette]. It later says in the same paragraph that "[toxicity inhaled and] absorbed are three to five times greater than that of tobacco smokers". Three to five times worse. I thought we just discovered that a joint was thirty-five times worse! This seems to be a contridiction until we look closer at the first statement. The first statement was referring to marijuana's chemicals [which have yet to be proven harmful and not even the article says they have harmed anyone]. While the second statement was referring to the lung and smoke dangers. It seriously has been proven that marijuana is worse for your lungs than cigarettes, but it is not a health issue, given that marijuana is not addictive. What I'm saying is that nobody will smoke enough marijuana to hurt their lungs. It's extremely rare that a marijuana user will smoke a stick a day for their entire life as people do with cigarettes. Much less likely is smoking handfuls of sticks of marijuana a day, as many cigarette users do). A study conducted at the University of California, Los Angeles shows that the way smokers inhale marijuana and hold it in the lungs adds to the damage. (A study using my own brain and common sense shows that legalizing marijuana and lowering it's price [from removing it from the black market and retail competition] would enable users to afford to take the plant by eating it [w/brownies perhaps], reducing any possible lung damage to 0%. I wonder why the paragraph didn't mention that...)

"If their stark reality will make you think, will make you aware that something must be done to wipe out this ghastly menace, then this blog will not have failed in its purpose. Because the dread Marihuana may be reaching forth for your son or daughter… or yours…OR YOURS!"

Current Music: Dead Kennedys - Dreadlocks Of The Suburbs (live)
My Rating: 4

Amish Girls Gone Wild

I saw the Devil's Playground today. It was way different from what I was expecting. It was actually about Amish kids and what they do when they are released into the outside world away from their community. It wasn't really that great, but then again, I don't really like much stuff. In fact, I've started a list of things I hate. Maybe you will be on it see it someday.

Current Music: GC5 - Bars To Me
My Rating: 2

Raab Himself

Now the answer you've all been waiting for (who is Bizzaro Matt Damon?). Well, he actually is "Raab Himself" from CKY (not the band, the videos). You know, the guy who feeds meat to key keys (cats) and pees on electric fences.

PS: I had the greatest idea today: the OVERSIZED DIME. Think of the possibilities. You could put it next to something and when you took a picture it would appear much smaller!

Current Music: Easy Star All-Stars - Any Colour You Like (Pink Floyd)
My Rating: 4

Dildos and Doorbells

Remember the other day when I typed in a bunch of stuff about sex and dildos? That was to try and change the banner above that was affected by what my blog says. It worked too, the day I typed that in, one of the things the banner said was: christian lyrics. I'm serious. It worked just as planned. Also, it has come to my attention that some people thought my semi-recent story about the too girls at my door was some whimsical tale I had made up. The rendezvous at my doorstep actually did happen, and in all fairness, the stories I do make up are way better than that.

Current Music: Voodoo Glow Skulls - Elephantitis

Today's History Lesson

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Bizzaro Matt Damon

Could it be... Bizzaro Matt Damon!?!?

to be contuvre...

Current Music: MAOM - Philip K. Dick In The Pet Section Of A Wal-Mart
My Rating: 4